This time I win

Anyone seen the movie Rocky Balboa? I’m a big fan of the Rocky character and in this movie he says this to his son: “it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!” I can identify with that. Life hits hard, and it has hit me hard in the past, but like Rocky I bounce back, I keep moving forward, and I’m so glad I did.

The flight with Emirates went quickly by, even though it was about 20 hours. They had this amazing entertainment system called ICE. In it I could choose from 100+ movies and TV series. I think I watched 6 movies on the way to Indonesia. Of course, I only got about 1 hour sleep. I even bought a sleeping mask and a special pillow to make me sleep. The entertainment was so good that sleep was an impossible dream. I had 2 stops before Jakarta. 3 hours in Dubai and then 1 hour in Kuala Lumpur. With every stop, me and Kei exchanged text messages.

My heart was racing and pulsating the closer I got to Jakarta. Expectations were sky high and I came out into the crowd of people looking for their loved ones. I found mine, as the crowd seemed to part. “Love” she said with a coy smile. My heart was racing no more, but came to a full stop as I admired her beauty. This was the girl who I exchanged text messages with, the girl from the pictures, the love of my life. “She looks even better in real life” I screamed on the inside so only my brain could hear it. “Loooove!” I said enthusiastic as I finally held her in my arms. If I had been in the pits before, I was finally on the highest mountain with a majestic view and opportunities in abundance. I almost forgot mom and dad standing next to her, but they got a hug too. Her family is truly wonderful. Her parents love me as their son, and her siblings treat me as their brother. No wonder Kei is such an amazing person with parents like that.

The 3 weeks there seemed to go so fast, but we got to do all the things we never could before, and that makes the 3 weeks better than the last 3 years. It’s about quality, not quantity. We didn’t get to go to Bali or do much sightseeing, but for me it didn’t matter one bit. I got to see Kei, I got to talk to her, touch her hair and tell her that I love her face to face.

On October 7th we got engaged on a hot Sunday evening. First I asked Kei’s parents for permission to marry her, and they had no objections. We rented this beautiful Italian place called Ti Amo and the 36 guests seemed to enjoy every second. I went down on my knees and proposed to Kei and she laughed and said: “Of course I’ll marry you!” In truth I already knew the answer, but it’s always good to hear it and especially at that moment. We put on our rings and did a celebratory toast, it was finally done. The night was ours and we took it and made it beautiful in the name of love.

I also became a Nichiren Buddhist while I was there. I never really believed in anything all my life, I only went to church at funerals. Buddhism seemed like it was made for me and I took a choice for life. Praying makes me stronger and will help me achieve all my goals in life.

I wouldn’t call my little adventure in Indonesia a movie, because it would have a sad ending. The guy leaves the girl at the airport. Heartbroken, he has no choice. However, it’s an ongoing series with lots of twists and turns and since me and Kei are directing it, you will love the ending. Maybe ending isn’t the right word. It will never end according to our marriage date 8.8.8. The number 8 is infinity, and that can be the title of our voyage.

So I’m back in England, and she’s still in Indonesia. It will be hard for us both. I will go back there in July and until then save as much money as possible. I’m sure there are lots more to tell, but it’s enough for now. Tomorrow I hope to make a picture blog with lots of pictures!

What the heart wants, the heart gets

“Insanity, when the heart wakes up in the night wanting. This heart doesn’t want to be alone anymore and soon… soon it will get its wish”

It’s been 4 months and 20 days and me and Kei are still together. People told me that if we didn’t see each other for 3 months, we wouldn’t make it. We are still here, making it. I could talk about what a crazy year it has been and what I have experienced, what I’ve been through, but nothing can prepare me for the weeks ahead, the 3 most important weeks of my life.

What the heart wants, the heart gets. Insane isn’t it? The things we never knew about this life just a year ago, a month ago, a week ago or even a second ago. Then again, life isn’t about knowing is it? It is all about the experience and the constant questions to which we really have no answer. What is love for example? No one knows, we all might have theories, but the most important thing in most people’s life is love, and we still haven’t got a clue.

Well, I am about to find out a few more things about myself and life. I will probably not update this blog for a while as I am not taking my laptop with me. When I am there, I want to do other things than I do here at home. So I see you all when I get back, right?

Fallen Earth

In November last year I wrote a novel called ”Fallen Earth”, but I left the last 20 pages of it unwritten. I wrote about 200 pages, and then I just stopped. Well, thanks to Kei, I am finishing it now and I am going to publish it in Indonesia with her help. I am almost there now, just a few more pages and I can call it a wrap. It will be an important lesson in “letting go”. I am a perfectionist and 6 months ago, I would never consider publishing it because I thought it was not good enough. It is not about making it perfect, but it is about finishing something that I’ve started which is very difficult for me. I am ready to accept it like it is and actually get it all done for once. Thanks Kei!

Speaking of, only 9 days until I go! How exciting is that? A whole new world is opening up for me and Kei. I’ve been to Asia before, but I expect Indonesia to be a lot different from China. When I was in China, I thought like a westerner and I acted like one too. I was seen as impolite and rude by most people which surprised me, but it’s just so different. I learnt a lot by being there about other cultures and ways to do things. When I get to Indonesia I will be more aware of how things are. I will still be myself, but I can use my experience from China to make it a better experience for myself and Kei. I guess the most important thing I learned from China was to not assume anything. Assumptions always lead to trouble. I somehow assumed that in big cities like Shanghai that things would be like in western cities. How wrong I was.

This will me my last “normal” day at work for a while. For the whole of next week I will have RAS (Remote Access Server) training. I’m really looking forward to it as I get to learn a new skill which will be very useful in my work. RAS is basically all about connecting remotely to computers and do troubleshooting remotely. The only drawback of having training next week is that immediately after that I will be away from work for 3 weeks and would have forgotten a lot when I get back. Oh well I will deal with that when it comes. Have a great weekend everyone!

The friendship conspiracy

I love conspiracy theories, but I rarely pay them much attention, just a bit of fun. During the last year or so I’ve gotten quite a few online friends. In June last year (I think it was), my first online friend was made. Her name is Cindy and she’s now one of my best friends. I was pretty new in the online social networking business, so I made quite a few friends after that, but only a few are still with me. One such friend is Rina. She is from Singapore, but she was living in USA at the time with her husband and kids when I met her. I think we met around November or December last year (Correct me if I’m wrong here Rina!).

I have this theory that everyone is connected somehow, but the incident a couple of days somehow made it all suspicious and conspiratory. Ok, so this is how it went. I chatted with Cindy:

[07:07] Xiao Yao :: hey J..guess what
[07:08] BleachJT: what?
[07:12] Xiao Yao :: it seems your writings and the one about how you found internet love and then lost that.....well..i think ppl are talking about it
[07:12] Xiao Yao :: one of my friends in NY has heard about you thru a friends of his
[07:14] Xiao Yao :: Chael says:
I noticed one of your facebook friends is jorn
Chael says:
small world, I don't really know him, but I know about him through a friend, heard about his fanastic tale of finding internet love and losing it due to the worst luck.. he's like famous for it

Now just the thought that some random guy in USA know about me from some friend is mind blowing, just because I wrote about it in some random blog on the internet.
I was really shocked by this and I called Kei and told her about it and when I came home Rina was online and I just had to tell her this amazing story. She was like: “Hey, I know this Chael. It was me who told him!”

MIND EXPLOSION!!



So then… how did my two worlds collide in this unlikely way? Cindy and Rina has never met or talked to each other, yet something is going on.

What if all the people I chose to be my friend are actually linked in this manner? What does it mean? I was thinking that the world is collapsing onto me now and everything is coming together like an implosion of friends. I should make one of those huge wall sized maps with all my friends there, and the links between them. Would that make me a conspiracy nut? It’s a conspiracy!

Bobo

Everyone I know has had some kind of stuffed animal when they were young (and some still do when they are old). Mine was this sorry looking thing which I called Bobo. My little sister found this thing online on a website for lost stuff. Now I'm not sure it's lost somewhere, I just don't know where it is. I asked my big sister about it, and she thought I still had it, lol.

I can't really remember why I liked this thing so much. My little sister loved this carrot she called Dingolingolansj. I bought it for her when I was on vacation in Crete I think. Stuffed carrots make great friends too. My fiancée has this cute thing called Momo, I think it is a bee of some kind.

I think I had an imaginary friend too, but I am not sure if it is a false memory or a real one. I would like to have one today, how do I go about it? Is there some place I can request an imaginary friend? There should be an imaginary friend repository somewhere, where you could apply for an imaginary friend. I did a search for it online, but I could only come up with a few definitions and personal stories. My theory is that if everyone had an imaginary friend, the world would be a much better place. You would always have someone to talk to at all times and they would always listen and even talk back. Of course, all psychoanalysts and therapists would be out of a job, but it's a small price to pay.

My fiancée made me a digitally stuffed animal by the way :D.

Who replace these precious "friends" when we grow up?

130 free days

I am obsessed with time at the moment trying to figure out how to best use my available time. This week I will be working about 54 hours, exercise for about 11 hours, sleep for 35 hours which means I have about 65 hours of free time. 65 hours is a lot of time when you think of it. This is the time which I am at home doing “nothing”. Now every week won’t be like this, it will be differences over a whole year, but let’s say I had 60 hours on average free time per week. That would amount to 3120 hours per year. That’s actually 130 days. 130 days where I don’t sleep, but 130 x 24 hours. It’s fair to say that with all that time, I could pretty much do anything I want and still have time to spare. If you had 130 free days per year, what would you do with them and why?

My ear still hasn’t cleared up, but I think it is a little better now. Could be that the doctors were right. Olive oil might do the trick. If it hasn’t cleared up by Wednesday I think I will go see the doctor anyway, just to see what they have to say.

34 days until I go to Indonesia and see Kei. Hehe I remember when it was 100. The time really flies. I’m so excited! Today is a bank holiday in England, but I still have to be at work. That’s fine, because the pay is really good. Speaking of, there will be no lunch at work today so I better go prepare something.

The beauty of sound

Friday morning I woke up with a strange sensation. The alarm clock didn’t sound as annoying as usual. Something was wrong. All I could hear in my left ear was a strange wind sound. I couldn’t hear a thing on my left ear and that truly sucked. I knew what it was though since I have had trouble with this last year. My left ear canal is blocked by some ear wax. Usually it goes away by applying heat so I took a long warm shower. It didn’t help this time.

It was interesting to work on Friday since I have to talk on the phone all day, but it went ok. I got some ear drops at the local pharmacy to be used 2 times a day for up to 3 days. I’m on my third day now and my left ear is still blocked. After work today I will go to a doctor and see what they can do. I am getting used to this condition though and it’s not so annoying anymore. When I do get my hearing back, I will enjoy the beauty of sound.

Yesterday was Sunday and guess where I was? At work! That’s right, Sunday work. I applied for some weekend work a while ago and now I will work 6 Sundays in a row. Never worked on weekends before but it was actually kind of nice. It was a lot more challenging as half of the issues were things I am not trained for yet. Working for 6 days might be hard, but it’s good to get the extra money for my future expenses. I am working hard for me and Kei. I hope I can continue to work weekends but I hear rumors that they might stop it here and move the weekend work to India.

Anyway, going to work soon. It’s Monday and I start work at 6.30. Wohoo! Oh, and happy birthday to Kei’s dad today.

I'm engaged!

I apologize for the quality of the ring picture. It is a still frame taken from a video Kei sent me of the rings. That's her hand with the ring on. That video was taken July 29th, so I guess you can say we have been engaged for a while, and the plan was to tell the world in October when I went to Indonesia, but we couldn't wait any longer, hehe.

It's been quite a year hasn't it? Right now I am just so happy that I have her. Every morning I wake up smiling to her good morning text message to me. I still remember when I asked her to be mine on May 7th. What a great decision that was, probably the best decision of my life. We found each other long time ago, I am sure of that. I will tell you all about it in another blog.

I can't wear my ring until I get to Indonesia but that's ok. In my heart I can feel the love every day. I am so proud that my future wife Kei is wearing the ring right now. I must be the luckiest and happiest man alive. It’s Only 1.5 months now until I get there and we will have the best 3 weeks of our life, and we will start planning the wedding together. The details of that will also come in a later blog.

You know, this just goes to show that if you believe, if you really want something you can get it no matter how impossible it seems. In April when everything seemed doom and gloom I kept thinking that this is not the end, I will fight back, I will never give up, I choose to be happy no matter what. Then I got a great new job and my love Kei come into my life. And folks, the best is yet to come!

I am engaged to the most wonderful woman I have ever met. I am so thankful for you Kei, thank you for loving me, thank you for everything you give me every second of my life. Love, this is just the beginning of our happiness. I love you so much Kemala Ayu Lestari, I am so proud and happy to become your husband.

What's in this envelope?

As I was walking home from the store on Saturday a little kid ran up to me. He stretched his right arm to me as far up as he could and with a thick mancunian accent spelled out: "Mister, This is for you!" I took the white envelope he was holding in his hand and asked him what it was. All he said was: "Don't open until Christmas!" Then he ran away with his little legs. So my guess is as good as yours. I will open it at Christmas time and the mystery will be revealed.

Only 1.5 months now until I get to see my love. Kei is really wonderful and we have really grown closer this last week. Last week there was an earthquake 100km away from Jakarta. It was really scary for me as I called her but couldn't get a hold of her. She was of course fine, but I always worry when I can't get hold of her. That's because I love her so much.

Yesterday was my last free Sunday for a while. Last week I applied for Sunday work and I got it. I will work 6 Sundays in a row from this Sunday. I will work 9 hours every Sunday and will earn 20% more per hour than I usually do. It will be hard, because I have never worked on weekends before, but it will really help me and Kei. On Sundays, all I do is sit at home surf the internet and chat anyway. I can do this at work in-between calls and get paid for it.

Power restored

Yesterday I found out that me and Superman has something in common. We are both powered by the sun. That's right, yesterday the sun shone. It's really for the first time in a month for me that I could enjoy it. I took a nice long walk and let the sun just restore my batteries. I feel energized and ready for another month without sun.

It's a great new week ahead and I am so thankful for everything these days. I guess you can say I'm a very happy and lucky guy. I'll be going off to work shortly and I am so happy that I have a job to go to, that I can go to the training studio after work and just enjoy life and what it has to offer.

Kei, I am so thankful for having you in my life. I love you so much.

Have a great week!

Jakarta

Yesterday I ordered a ticket to Indonesia. I will be going on September 30th. The flight will take about 1 day and October 1st I will meet Kei for the first time. I am so excited! I will stay there for a whole 3 weeks. It's not long now, only a little over 2 months and I am counting the days.

I think there is some kind of rain record in England right now. Yesterday was one of the few days without rain, the second in about a month. People are talking about the wettest summer ever. It could very well be, but it doesn't bother me. I am used to the rain, and I actually like it. However they predict that August will be really nice.

My life is full of sunshine anyway (metaphorically speaking)

Thank you for Monday!

This weekend was fun! On Saturday I went out to this fancy hotel for my team coach Lars wedding party. He got married to Christine 2 weeks ago in Malta. It was my first wedding party. I got dressed up and felt like a million bucks, hehe. The only thing is that as the night went on, I missed Kei a lot. Wished she was there with me. But you know, as I watched the happy married couple I realized how lucky I am to have Kei in my life. That would be us in the future, I feel it, I want it, I need it.

Monday is great! A new week, new possibilities. Every day is great these days, so I am thankful for everything that I have. Monday is just as good as Friday or Saturday I think. It's just as beautiful. In an hour I have to get ready for work and I look forward to it. I like to sit on the bus on my way to work reading the morning newspaper and just feel that energy that I have these days.

After work I will go to the gym again. I think I am addicted, hehe. I have so much energy now and I can't wait to go there and beat my old records, become better than I ever was. I love to run, the treadmill is my favorite. I can just keep running there for a long time, but I know my limits. Every time I am done there I feel really dizzy, so I better not overdo it no matter how fun it is. Well enjoy your week!

Inside a procrastinators mind

My internet connection is so slow this morning, and it’s testing my patience. I know that I will win though, because in the end it doesn’t matter if my internet connection is slow or fast. Wait, let me start over… I was supposed to get up 47 minutes than I did and that is not so good. I kept ignoring the alarms and I do have a lot of alarms going off. I am trying to see if I can do anything about my procrastination so yesterday evening I made a lot of tasks and appointments in Outlook and it’s those alarms that have been going off this morning. Since I overslept by 47 minutes, the procrastinator gets to live another day.

It’s interesting though, I was discussing this with a friend yesterday about how I can beat this procrastination habit of mine. I am trying a new approach now, not only writing down every task that I have to do, but I also made a formula. I am a numbers person and I love stats. That is why I can run on treadmill in a training studio and not outside for real. I need to see my heart rate, calories burned, how long I have been running, speed and distance. So maybe I can take this fact and bring it do my everyday tasks and appointments. Today for example I have 6 appointments and 3 tasks. I have given every one of them a procrastination level (PL) score and importance factor (IF) score. PL goes from 0.1 to 1.0 where 0.1 is something I will do anyway and 1.0 I will do if I get a gun to my head; maybe… well you get the point. Then IF goes from 0 to 100 how important I think it is for me personally. So I multiply PL by IF and get what I call life points. I will add these points to a spreadsheet and see what percentage I am at when it comes to doing my stuff. I want to reach 100% and obviously get as many points as possible. I’m thinking of having a reward if I get a 1000 points. It’s in the test phase, but so far I like this idea a lot. By the way, if I finish this blog I get 10 points. Yeay! I can get 177 points total today. Anyone got other good ideas?

The workout yesterday was amazing. Even with pain I tried harder, ran longer and overall killed all my previous records. Now my body is going to rest until Monday. After all, the muscles need rest to grow. I am thinking of a 4 day per week routine going from Monday to Thursday and rest from Friday to Sunday.

I miss Kei, but she has no credit on the phone right now. Hopefully she will get some soon so I can hear from her.

According to my morning tasks I need to take a shower in 2 minutes. I will not get points for this though because I do it every morning and I don’t see it as a chore, but it will be interesting to see if I can keep my schedule because I have been showering at different times. Have a great weekend!

My arms and legs aren't falling off yet

So my 2 first days of this new workout regime of mine is over and I am happy to say that my arms are still attached and my legs don't hurt too much. I was expecting it to happen, but I don't mind that it hasn't. Anyway, day 3 is today. I plane to do this from Monday to Thursday and give it 3 days rest before I start torturing myself on Monday. Saying that, torture has never been more fun!

It's comfortable at work these days. Most people are on vacation so the calls are less. I get to read my RSS feeds and chat with Kei and my friends. The soup is still good and the lunch is delicious. Happy days!

Kei and myself are doing great, even though we don't call each other as often as before. It gets ridiculously expensive really fast, so we decided to send a lot of text messages instead and of course chat when we can.

7 Wonders of the world

As you may or may not know, someone decided that we needed 7 new wonders of the world since 6 of the 'old' wonders of the world is gone. The only one left standing is the pyramids of Giza. The new list is as follows: Brazil's Statue of Christ Redeemer, Peru's Machu Picchu, Mexico's Chichen Itza pyramid, the Great Wall of China, Jordan's Petra, the Colosseum in Rome and India's Taj Mahal. Apparently over 100 million voted for these.

I didn't vote for it myself, but I've been thinking about my list. What are my 7 wonders of the world?

In no particular order:

1. Me

That's right. I am a wonder of my world. Without me, this list wouldn't exist, this blog wouldn't exist. Can you imagine a world without me?

2. Kei

She is a wonder to me. You can have your pyramids, your machu picchus, your colosseums, but nothing can replace her. My world would be missing a wonder if she wasn't here.

3. My friends

Yes, without my friends, a big part of me would be missing. I need my friends and I love them very much. Some may come and go, but you will always be special to me.

4. My family

That's a given. Without them I wouldn't be here. Wherever I go, whatever I do, they will always be there supporting me. Their support means the world to me.

5. Music

What a lifeless boring world it would be if there wasn't music. I need music. It's my passion, my joy. Music can be everything. A time machine to the past and the future, a comfort in time of need. Music is magic.

6. Love

I can't explain love, but it is a wonder of my world. It is the most powerful force I can think of. Being in love is the most amazing feeling. What can be better than that?

7. Belief

You have to have belief. We all have it, but without hope, without belief I wouldn't be able to do what I want to do. It constantly pushes me forward, making me grow as a person. That to me is amazing. Belief can really move mountains. If you believe it, it will happen.

So there you have it. My list of 7 wonders of the world. But why limit it to 7? I have many more wonders like the sun, the forest, the mountains, the ocean, the stars; the moon... the list goes on and on. Right now I am listening to music, thinking about my love Kei (who is down with fever at the moment), writing this for all my friends and family, and with strong belief that Kei will be fever free soon.

Bali

Well, it's been a couple of exciting days for me. I've started taking calls at work, which means I'm officially working, yeay! It's been quite busy actually, but I like it. Whenever i work I change. I never really thought about it, but when I work I get in focus mode. It's my perfectionist side showing.

I like Friday! Not that I don't enjoy work, but it's weekend, my time! As usual I have no plans, but that's not the point is it? I can spend all my focus on Kei instead of working.

I've applied for a 3 week vacation from work in October because I'm going to Indonesia to see my girl! Talked to my team coach and he said it should be ok, just need to verify with my team leader who is currently in Moscow but will be back on Monday. Yeah, I can hardly believe it. It will be me and her for 3 weeks. The first 4-5 days we will spend in Jakarta with her family and friends then we will spend 7 days in beautiful Bali, then 5 days in spectacular Lombok. Can you tell I'm excited? Woooooooo!

Have a great weekend!

Chester

Yesterday started really great. Kei called me just to tell me that she missed me. She’s so good to me. Then we chatted online for a bit and then she called again. At around 11am I was going to go for a walk and I got this crazy idea. The weather was really beautiful and I just wanted to travel somewhere. I took the bus to the train station and went to Chester, just like that. I’ve never done anything like that before, just go somewhere on impulse. It was exhilarating and I felt so free. I had a great day there and me and Kei texted each other throughout the day, like she was with me to Chester :).

Chester is a great city. It used to be a roman city, which the architecture really shows. It was once a great wall around the city which is still there now. I walked on it and soaked up the history. I spent all day there and came home around 7.30pm. My feet really hurt after all that walking, but it was really amazing. I am going to take Kei there someday. It’s a very romantic place and I saw a lot of couples there and I thought about me and Kei. It’s a magic place and I met some great people. I went into a little bookstore that was on top of the wall and I met this Canadian woman who had lived in the UK for 28 years and still sounded like a Canadian. It’s amazing that she hadn’t adopted a UK accent by now.

When I got home I got some bad news. My dad had been taken to the hospital due to a small stroke. But he’s a strong man, and he’s ok. The doctor’s say everything is fine with him and they will keep him for observation for a few days. Kei called me this morning to hear if I was ok, and to tell me she will always stand beside me no matter what happens.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Plans

Are you the kind of person that plan your days ahead, what you are going to do in the weekend? Does it work for you? I am usually not that structured, but isn’t dreams some sort of plans or is it just wishful thinking? As we grow older, we get new dreams all the time before we make our old dreams come true. I remember one dream I had when I was young. I wanted to be a professional footballer. I was playing football for my local team hoping that a talent scout would come and see what a great footballer I was. Of course that never happened, and I probably wasn’t such a great footballer anyway. Over the years I’ve probably had lots of dreams and I still do. I wonder if any of my dreams came true.

This weekend I actually had a plan and was so excited about it. On Sunday I was going to a beautiful place called Edale with my friend Katy. Unfortunately her back was a mess today and couldn’t go. So I spent today with the people I love instead, not a bad substitute I have to say. I have another plan, but it is more long term. I want to go to Indonesia for a 2 week vacation in August/September to see Kei. In order to make that happen I have to do some serious planning. The biggest issue will be money (isn’t it always). I have just started a new job, so money will have to be saved rigorously during the next months. I have the best reason in the world to do it, so motivation won’t be a problem.

Even more long term I have dreams about more regularity with me and Kei. The how and when isn’t yet planned, but things are going really well at the moment. I bought a web cam on Friday so Kei could see me “live”. She bought a webcam as well today but we had some troubles with the internet connection so I could only see her 20 seconds at a time. I’d rather have 20 seconds than nothing at all. It was fun! Her smile is just amazing.

Tomorrow is a bank holiday both in the UK and Norway so I don’t have to go to work. I have no plans, but that means there’s no chance of failure. I am looking forward to this week as my training is almost over. I have one training day on Wednesday, but then I get to do some real work. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Kei and Jørn's Song

Here's a song I made for me and Kei. Hope you all enjoy it!

The beautiful game

I’ve just seen the game between Liverpool FCand AC Milan in the Champions League final. AC Milan won 2-1 in the end. As some of you know I am a huge Liverpool FC fan, and have been since I was about 10 years old. That’s 20 years of passion, laughter, tears, hope and glory. A lot has happened to both Liverpool FC and myself in the last 20 years. I am disappointed of the result tonight, but I am not down and beaten like I used to be in the old days. Maybe the game is just a game after all.

Overall I would say the last 20 years has been happy years, not so much for Liverpool FC, but for myself. In all my wins and losses I can still see the man in the mirror and praise him of a job well done. I’m proud of that guy. I know that he loses with me and he wins with me, just like all the Liverpool FC fans out there. It’s great to belong to a community, a place where your opinion matters, a place where you can share your joys and woes.

So Liverpool FC lost the final, well its ok. The future is very bright indeed for both Liverpool FC and myself. I have everything I ever wanted, my life is good, really good. My love Kei, my friends, my family, my job, myself. Those are the cold facts if you will, a testament to my happiness. They are all there in my life, to guide me, to help me. How can I be unhappy because of a game of football when I have all that?

It may still be a beautiful game, but not as beautiful as the game of life. Take a thing like love, the love between me and Kei. The beautiful Kei is part of my life, and it’s not a game, it’s real and tangible. Like two attractors, we are pulled towards each other during strange events in the universe. There’s no need to ask the questions, because we already have the answers we need. Tomorrow is another beautiful day. Rise and shine people!